Dear Society,
Why does our society make such unintentionally hurtful comments about culture? Why was it so hard for me to express my own culture without the internal feeling that I was being severely judged by my classmates? Growing up, I have always possessed an immense love for my Chinese culture. Throughout elementary school, I found joy in expressing my heritage to my classmates, yet in middle school, everything seemed to change.
Beginning in preschool, I began participating in traditional Chinese dance, and I soon fell in love with the artistry of the sport. Chinese dance not only introduced me to some of my closest friends today, but the activity allowed me to branch out culturally and understand my heritage. In sixth grade, I remember telling a friend of mine about my love for Chinese dance. I don’t exactly remember what she responded, but I do remember that my eagerness for the activity declined rapidly after. Whenever anyone else asked me about my favorite sport, I hesitated to say “Chinese dance.” I begged my mom to let me start playing lacrosse just so that I could have a proper, respectable answer to the question “What is your favorite sport?” Lacrosse was just not my thing, but whenever I told someone I played lacrosse, they would tell me how “cool” I was, a comment that I never received when I used to tell my friends that I did Chinese dance.
It wasn’t just Chinese dance. I loved Chinese music and TV but never felt comfortable expressing this to my friends when they asked about my favorite movies and songs. At school events, I would never speak Chinese when responding to my parents. The worst part was that none of my classmates meant to make me feel this way--they inadvertently did through various microaggressions and comments that made me feel less and less eager about my love for Chinese culture.
I hope to convey two things. First, we all ought to be more aware of what we say because a few words can change one’s passion or love for something. I never knew that a few ignorant comments from my classmates about Chinese culture would stop me from loving Chinese dance for at least three years. In middle school, I was so desperate to separate myself from my culture that I temporarily quit the sport (a horrible decision looking back). Second, please hold onto your culture and what you love no matter what. For me, my culture intersects directly with my passions, but whatever unordinary activity you love to do, whether underwater chess or trampolining gymnastics--keep doing it. Don’t let your fear of judgement or a few comments from a friend change your perception--because I wish that I was never affected by my friends’ comments. Your passion is inherently yours--so don’t let go of it.
-Anonymous
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