Dear Society,
I have consistently battled with my cultural identity growing up, predominantly because of a lack of Vietnamese representation in my life.
It was a warm June evening and I asked a former Vietnamese acquaintance to borrow her phone so I could call my mom. She handed me her phone and I started to dial my mom’s number. The phone rings and she picks up. We go on to have a short normal conversation in Vietnamese and when I end the call, my acquaintance says “Wow.. you sound so white.” To which I responded,” Haha...I was born here in the states so my accent is a bit off.” She snapped back, “Well, I was born here and so is my mom, but I still have a Vietnamese accent.” I’ve never felt so ashamed in my life. I regret not putting more effort into learning my parents’ home language. I’ve always felt like I was “too white-washed” with my Vietnamese peers and “too ethnic” with my white peers.
As the daughter of two Vietnamese immigrants, I felt like an embarrassment. Disgrace. Dishonor. My parents have struggled and worked hard to immigrate to America just for me to lose sense of my culture, my language, and to be gentrified and white-washed by society. The absence of Vietnamese representation is not only prevalent in the media, but also within the community I lived in. Thus, I struggled making friends in school and often felt isolated in school and extracurriculars hence growing up in the suburbs, predominantly filled with whites.
However, as I entered high school, I finally discovered my identity and my own voice. I was exposed to new people from all different backgrounds. One thing most of the POC students at my high school could relate to is the feeling of feeling like an outsider. We could all relate to the struggles of living in a white-dominated community, therefore we understood each other’s struggles so well which made me feel less alone.
Many POC students -- including myself -- created and joined the Racial Equity Club at Glencoe to make an effort to educate others on racial issues, systems of power, and intersectionality. Racial Equity Club allowed many POC students to speak their truths, have a voice in their school’s community, and be an advocate. It also allowed me to find my cultural identity and embrace who I really am -- a Vietnamese American.
My parents immigrated to America for a better future for themselves and for my siblings and I. And every day, I constantly remind myself that. My parents’ sacrifices make me proud of where I come from and motivated me to make a difference within my community and school. Instead of battling between my Vietnamese side and American side, I’ve learned to accept both. My ethnicity and nationality are things I cannot change. Through Racial Equity Club and creating positive, healthy friendships, I can finally say that I’m proud to embrace my true identity.
-Anonymous
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